In our last small group, I refined my understanding of how to navigate the edges of energy and resistance. In order to expand, you really have to respect the need to withdraw or retreat, to turn down the volume of the energy, or to pull back from it a bit. My tendency is to push too hard, thinking that I'll miss an opportunity otherwise. But actually, that might send everyone into overreaction mode. By allowing just enough contraction and pulling back, I find that it's no longer a battle but instead a very respectful, even loving interaction.
Before, I have mostly identified with the streaming energy and have been trying to figure out how to break the logjams that I encounter. Now I'm able to become the fearful part instead but this time be present and quite awake to the energy in front of me. That's because I can see that the energy respects my needs. Almost immediately I find myself relaxing into welcoming more of it and/or merging into it. With my boundary being honored so respectfully, I can see and feel right away that there's actually no reason to fear. It was a false alarm. :-)
That still doesn't mean it's comfortable. But now I can enter the discomfort with more trust and with my eyes open (figuratively and literally).